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    January 30

    小年儿

    窗外已经是爆竹声阵阵,2007年似乎真的要过去了!
    刚刚吃了好吃的饺子,和爸妈看了自己的节目,心情平静而温暖。
    今天,一位好心的大姐和我聊了很多,鼓励我,批评我,劝解我,我真的听进去了,可我还是没有勇气按照她说的那样去做,因为这么多年自己心里的小骄傲吧!
    突然又想剪头发了,可心中又有点害怕,因为这么多次,总是抱着心里的美好,得来的却是现实的差距
    就如同我自己的生活,为了自己心里所以为的东西,坚守着自己的无论对错的固执,让自己苦不堪言,让爱我的人也筋疲力尽,即便这样,我还是没有丝毫的改变
    因为我知道,我就是这样,我清楚自己想要的是什么,如果得不到,我宁可都不要。这样不对,这样不好,可是我就是这么想的,也要这么做。
    身边的人,都在理性得和生活磨合,向现实妥协,而结果是他们得到了幸福!我没有幸福,并且我知道,他们是快乐的,我是痛苦的,他们是聪明的,而我,
    只是一个彻头彻尾的傻瓜。
    每天冥想半个小时,是一件不错的事情,可是我都没能这样做,现在,又一个年头要过去了,生活在改变着,我也是,每个人都是。
    看似平静的我,每时每刻心里都在经历着情感的激烈焦灼;看似雀跃的我,其实最渴望得是安静得生活在我一个人的世界里。又一个年头过去了,突然,不知道为什么,就很想念一些人和事,突然之间,这种强烈的思念,让我的思维穿梭在从高一开始的每一个时段里,想念着一些人和事。即便并不都是快乐,但是我发现自己活得真的有点太丰富了,经历得也挺多彩,就挺高兴了。是的,大家都说我是幸运的家伙,我没有太深的体会,但是如果我真的是,那也是件好事情吧!

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    Wei Xuwrote:
    各人有各人的活法。向现实妥协的人多,执着于自己的追求的人少,所以你不是傻,而是难能可贵。旧年就要过去了,新年来了,一切都会好:)
    30 Jan.

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